There’s a lot of talk about “the one.”
Finding your person.
Meeting your soulmate.
But what we don’t talk about enough is when we meet them – and who we are when we do.
Because sometimes we meet the right person at the wrong time.
Sometimes we meet them early and don’t recognize the gift.
Sometimes we recognize it… and still mishandle it.
And sometimes, after a lot of living, learning, and unlearning, we meet them when we’re finally ready to love well.
The Truth No One Likes to Admit
Love isn’t just about finding the right partner.
It’s about becoming the right partner.
Many of us enter relationships carrying unresolved wounds, unmet expectations, and quiet fears we haven’t faced yet. We want love to heal what only God can heal. We want someone else to bring peace to places we haven’t surrendered yet.
So even when a good person shows up — someone kind, patient, and sincere — we may not be ready to receive them.
That doesn’t make us bad.
It makes us human.
Sometimes You Find Them Early
Some people meet their partner young.
They grow together, stumble together, figure life out side by side.
That’s a gift — but it’s also work.
Because growing together requires humility, communication, forgiveness, and the willingness to mature at the same pace. When both people choose growth, love deepens. When only one does, cracks begin to form.
Early love survives not because it’s easy – but because both hearts stay teachable.
Sometimes You Find Them Later
After disappointment.
After thinking, Maybe love just isn’t for me.
Later love carries wisdom.
It knows what doesn’t work.
It recognizes red flags faster.
It values peace over chemistry alone.
Later love often isn’t loud or flashy — it’s steady, safe, and deeply rooted. It understands that consistency is more romantic than chaos ever was.
And Sometimes… You Find Them But You’re Not Ready
This one hurts the most.
You look back and realize:
“They were good.”
“They tried.”
“I just wasn’t whole yet.”
Immaturity doesn’t always look reckless. Sometimes it looks like fear.
Avoidance. Self-protection. Or chasing validation instead of depth.
God doesn’t waste these seasons.
Even the relationships that didn’t last often teach us what we needed to learn — about ourselves, about love, and about Him.
When Maturity Meets the Right Partner
When two people come together after doing their inner work – after surrendering their expectations to God — something shifts.
The relationship isn’t about completing each other.
It’s about walking together.
You grow – not apart, not competing
– but side by side.
You pray together.
You communicate honestly.
You choose peace even when it’s uncomfortable.
You build something steady, not perform something impressive.
This is the kind of love God desires – one rooted in faith, mutual respect, and purpose.
As I’ve walked through my own story — including the mistakes, the missteps, and the growth that came later — I realized how much of what I once believed about love needed to be unlearned.
I wrote about this journey more deeply in my first book, Mess, Mercy, and Miracles — not as a guidebook for perfect relationships, but as an honest reflection on how God patiently reshapes our understanding of love over time.
It’s a reminder that God doesn’t shame us for where we started. He meets us there — and invites us to grow.
What God Wants in Your Relationship
God isn’t interested in perfect couples.
He’s interested in surrendered hearts.
He wants relationships that reflect His character:
• Patience instead of pressure
• Grace instead of control
• Truth instead of appearances
• Peace instead of chaos
Whether you’re single, dating, or married, God’s invitation is the same:
Put Him first – and let love flow from there.
If You’re Still Waiting
If you haven’t met your partner yet – you’re not behind.
If you’ve lost one you thought would last – you’re not broken.
If you’re healing from past mistakes – you’re not disqualified.
God’s timing isn’t punishment.
It’s preparation.
Love that lasts isn’t rushed.
It’s built.
A Gentle Reminder
Sometimes the right partner comes quickly.
Sometimes they come later.
Sometimes they come after we’ve learned what we no longer want.
But when God is at the center, love grows differently.
It grows deeper.
It grows wiser.
It grows stronger.
And when it’s right — truly right — it brings peace, not confusion.
“Unless the Lord builds the house, those who build it labor in vain.” — Psalm 127:1
Love that lasts is built on God’s foundation — not looks, money, timing, or pressure — but faith, maturity, and grace.
Reflection
• Am I waiting for someone to bring peace that God is asking me to build with Him first?
• Have I grown from past relationships — or am I still carrying the same patterns forward?
• What does love built on faith look like in this season of my life?
These are the kinds of questions I continue to explore — both personally and in my writing.
If you’re seeking more encouragement today, you may find comfort in our Devotions or be strengthened by our Verse of The Day or Prayers, offering Scripture to carry with you throughout the day.
